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Oh God, and I Don’t Mean Trump; I mean GOD help us!

 -- Published: Monday, 26 August 2019 | Print  | Disqus 

David Haggith

It’s out of control. And I’m not even talking about the stock market, which fell off a cliff. I’m talking about the president who has deified himself. I hesitate to write strongly against Trump because I understand why many readers here voted for him, but today (Friday August-23) is a day that shall live in insanity!

I understand that we need someone who is anti-establishment; but, at the risk of offending my own audience, enough is enough with this guy! He’s done nothing but serve the establishment. He’s flooded the White House with establishment leaders. He’s currently turning himself into the perfect scapegoat for the Federal Reserve. But now he’s accepted a conspiracist’s anointing as the Second Coming of the Chosen One! I’m not concerned that someone said this about him, but about how quickly and proudly Trump wore it!

First, the stock market, which does need God’s help

Since the actions of the stock market were driven today by Trump’s mania (and since I need an economic tie-in), I’ll start with stocks as evidence of how much Trump rocks the boat the further off his own rocker he gets. (It is not even Trump’s economic policies or trade ingenuities that I’m going to write about. It is his now out-of-the-boat megalomania.)

In terms of the market’s apoplectic heaving today, one analyst wrote,

The moment of truth has arrived for stocks. The market, S&P 500 (SP500) is at a crucial inflection point here. The SPX can either breakout above 2,950, and go on to make higher highs, or the S&P 500 can break down below 2,850, and further reinstate the idea of this being the early stages of a bear market.

Seeking Alpha

I guess the stock market got a little truth today. Maybe it’ll get religion … when hell freezes over. It could sure use it. Stocks readily broke the lower bound described above with the Donald’s help and China’s and with little answer to the market’s prayers from the Fed in whom it trusts.

The S&P broke off the 2850 ledge to close at 2847 — touching 2843 intraday — no small decline at 2.6%. The Dow plummeted headlong 623 points — down 675 at one point — again no small drop at 2.4%. The Nasdaq plunged a more breathless 3%, down 240 points on the day. Markets closed down for the week for the fourth week in a row. But none of that was the scary part of the day. That was just the thrill ride.

The volatility was mostly Donald J. Trump. It all started when China promised in the early morning hours to retaliate against Trump’s new September tariff threat by upping the amperage on its own tariffs. (Gee, who could have seen that coming, what with trade wars being so easy to win?) That started the market down a jolt at dawn. Then J. Powell didn’t put enough liquor in the punch bowl, so the market went up when it saw him spiking the bowl but then down as soon as it tasted the punch and found out how weak it was. THEN … bursting into the Twitterverse, came the Donald … storming onto the scene with godlike rage. How dare the Chinese and the Powell defy him, rather than deify him!

That is where both the market and the Donald and everyone else got into all kinds of trouble. I’ll come to how the Donald accepted his anointing as “the chosen one,” but one has to wonder, chosen by whom, given how all hell broke loose on the markets with the yield curve inverting back and forth like a blinking recession warning light as the US 10YR bond tripped down to its lowest yield since August, 2016, at 1.50% intraday. The 3-mo.-over-10-yr hit its most inverted level since 2007. Stocks instantly dove headlong out the window. Trump pronounced the dollar strong, and the dollar immediately fell down a hole, convinced Trump might be ready to strangle it — if he can find a way — in a fit of currency manipulation to get back at China and Powell.

Jove’s lightning couldn’t have thundered around the canyons of Wall Street any more menacingly than it did at Trump’s blasphemy when Trumpian narcissism exceeded any former limits that might once have restrained him from self-deification. Only I think today was self-defecation in Trump’s case because even pastors and other Evangelical followers are calling him out on this one.

It all began like this as I was walking down Mulberry Street

A couple of days ago, conspiracy radio host Wayne Allyn Root praised the Golden One:

Trump kindly thanked him for the modest praise and borderline deification. (“Borderline only in that, fter all, Root did say, “like he is the…,” not “as the….”) You know, the usual King of Israel, Prince of Peace, Second-Coming of Christ stuff that is generally lauded on a president of the United States of America. I’m not exactly sure why Root thinks Jews in Israel would think in those terms, as they seem distinctly Christian to me, but that is just a technicality on this present scene of insane hubris.

Trump’s Twitter critics, however did things like raise their hands to him and say, “Praise the Lard” or suggest people try hanging him on a cross to see if he lives up to the title via resurrection or, as one called it, “just a whole new level of batshit crazy.”

Others took the legal approach: “25th amendment now!” Some even questioned how far along on this ride his Evangelical followers would be willing to go with him. (I’m thinking not much further if this keeps up … or, at least, hoping.) As for me, I started thinking there must be some form of gematria by which the name “Donald John Trump” adds up to something more than #45 — say maybe 666 — but I’ll let others do the math.

You see, the greater excitement or horror came later in the day when Trump took up the mantle and wore it as if it perfectly fits him. Looking briefly up to heaven (yes, literally) as if he saw a golden light over his shoulder that was something more than the orange glow of his own hair, President Trump proclaimed to all, “I am the chosen one”:

(I have to show the video, or who would even believe it, surreal as the scene is?)

Of course, the Donald was a little piqued at the moment he said this because Denmark had turned down his offer to purchase the Danish Demi-nation of Greenland. His anger at this, he said, was not personal. It’s just that you don’t do that to the president of the United States when he’s shopping for countries to pillage on the open market. You especially don’t call the offer “absurd.” He had, after all, made a perfectly respectable inquiry as to whether Greenland might be for sale. Since Denmark turned down his offer, he said he had to cancel his trip to the land of pastries.

Denmark tried to soften the president’s notable despondency by explaining to him that they are not really the rightful owner of this piece of ice. Without proper title, they cannot really sell it. Of course, no one bothered to talk to the peasants of Greenland during all of this to see what they thought about becoming vassals of the US state. Soylent Greenland is people. You cannot buy it like food.

Given T-Rump’s more flatulent trumpetings today, I suspect he will try to circumvent his setback to the Danes by taking Greenland via executive order … until someone explains to him that is not really a constitutional power of the presidency! At the time, however, he merely threatened to release ISIS warriors on Denmark or other parts of Europe and joked that he should give himself the Medal of Honor, which would set yet another presidential first.

Sounds a little like unleashing the Huns or the Goths upon them, but such is the work of kings, whether of Israel or of the US, and that, believe it or not, is where we wind up going in this zany story of the Scion of Zion — to King Trump. What a fitting last name, like “Citizen Kane,” only writ larger, huger, really, really bigger. I can hardly find the best words to describe it because Trump has all of them.

And then it got interesting

You see, that was just the talk of one twenty-four-hour period as we watched the president Don his new priestly and kingly robes, but then came today.

Oh my … gosh. Then came today when the president exploded the stock market. It was, however, not his explosion of the stock market that concerned me but all the things he trumpeted. Where to begin?

It started off with Trump’s morning rage over China’s announcement, expressed in the following tweet:

“Our great American companies are hereby ORDERED to immediately start looking for an alternative to China.”

Whoa! I thought. ORDERED? This godlike stuff has already taken him to Romanesque dictatorial levels. The Caesar-in-Chief has spoken! Trump didn’t stop there, though. No Great One would be satisfied with just one decree:

Not bad for one morning: commanding all US companies to move operations out of China and back to the US and commanding all private shipping companies, not just the US Mail, to search and refuse packages of Fentanyl.

No wonder they call him “The Donald.” I guess this makes him the “Don-in-Chief” of the US economy. First all American corporations ORDERED to return home, then all carriers ORDERED. I guess he’s learned something from his happy associations with President Kim about how to command an economy. What could be more delightfully communist than central planning enforced by a wannabe-dictator? Maybe it’s the company he’s been keeping. Move over Lesser God Kim! Make way for the Great Orange One!

Apparently, he didn’t get the constitutional memo that this is not how the American economy functions. The president does not have the power to issue executive orders to corporations to move all operations.

Perhaps some would excuse a mere mortal for getting all blustery like this, given how his day went. I mean, the day did not exactly look like a big win on the trade war for Trump. Since trade wars are supposed to be easy, President Donald took the easy way out, and ordered trade to go as he has said it should. Gods do not have to limit their powers as mere mortals are confined to do.

I wonder what his plan for enforcement is if these companies don’t start packing their bags? I am sure there are plenty of agencies the president can use to strong-arm them into action. The IRS comes to mind. Not constitutional, you say? Well, that does not appear to matter.

The president also oddly included a statement that the economy is way too strong for this. If the economy is “way too strong,” why has he been sending out the entire WH staff all week to tell us how strong it is, and why are he and all his staff badgering the Federal Reserve Chair, Jerome Powell, relentlessly for help as the stock market collapses around Trump’s words?

To again note this economic strength, the president commented that, thanks to the last 2-1/2 years of his presidency, our economy is now much larger than China’s:

It might be time to call in the Queen of Denmark to offer Trump a little additional schooling here: The US economy has always been MUCH larger than China’s.

I expect the next round of decrees will go something like, “While you are at it, American companies, you are also hereby ordered to host all corporate events at Trump hotels and to buy Boeing 737 Max’s and … let’s see … what other parts of the economy do I need to decree into greatness today? Oh yes, I also hereby order Jerome Powell to lower interest by 100 basis points, and I order an idol created in my image to replace the Washington Monument since I am the Chosen One. It needs to be made of gold. I like gold. A lot. Gold is good. It’s a good thing. Oh yes, and using my divine powers, I decree America into greatness again! Oh, and I also order Wendy’s, McDonalds and Burger King to send a cheeseburger to everyone in the nation, except illegals, to celebrate Donald Trump Day, which I hereby decree all shall bow to on my birthday from this year forward and forevermore. Let it be so, let it be done.”

Then, this particularly odd day on Mulberry Street ended with President Trump fuming at Jerome Powell for not spiking the punch bowl enough (even though the Donald doesn’t usually like his punch spiked and prefers his cheeseburgers with a good American Coke):


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